Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing/Characters: Buffy/Angel, Buffy/Scott, Buffy/Parker, Buffy/Riley, Buffy/Spike phew
Description: Angel was her One. The One. The One that six-year old girls dream about along with ponies and ballet shoes.
Challenge: Written for word_pictures, screencap #3
Disclaimer: Joss Whedon and ME just won't hand over the BtVS cast to me however many times I offer them money. Or Miss Kittyfantastico. Okay well some may find it a little tricky to see what exactly went on in my mind between looking at the cap and writing the fic, so I'll give you the lowdown. I didn't know which episode the screencap was from and when someone told me it was the one when Buffy's checking out Parker in a mirror-thingy I was all Oh yeah Parker! I remember him. Then it was Ooh and remember Scott? And I realised Buffy had had quite a few sucky relationships and so this fic was born.
1. She lets them die.
Angel was her One. The One. The One that six-year old girls dream about along with ponies and ballet shoes. The prince that’s going to sweep them off their feet. And at sixteen, there’s nothing Buffy Summers wants more than her knight in shining amour to come rescue her from this place.
She finds him, unexpected, at the end of a midnight alley. He’s tall, dark, heart-achingly handsome. He’s everything she’s ever dreamed of. But if there’s one thing Buffy’s learnt it’s that dreams don’t come true.
Final moment – It comes half way through a fight, muddled amid the kicks and punches. It takes her a split second to realize what’s happened. Another split second to come to her decision. And in between the two she feels it, calmly almost distantly, her heart splitting neatly in two. The sorrow is there, beneath the surface but for now she pushes back, she has to do what’s right. Whispered words of comfort. A kiss. A death.
She knows you’re supposed to do right by your love, but what happens when that becomes a contradiction? What happens when you kill your knight in shining armor? What happens then…
Close your eyes.
2. She turns them gay.
Scott was her attempt at normality. The sweet boy that she meets at school and who brings her flowers. He’s kind and makes her laugh. Tentative kisses help sooth the loss of passionate ones and she can’t help but hope that with a normal boyfriend and normal friends something might start to rub off on her. But if there’s on thing Buffy’s learnt it’s that she’ll never be normal.
Final moment – It comes almost as unexpected as the last. And maybe that’s the problem, so busy she’d never even noticed they weren’t working out. And for it to end on something so trivial as time, or the lack of it, “distraction” was never Buffy’s greatest fault. On top of that is the surprise, she never saw it coming. And as Scott walks away from her she wonders if she ever really knew him at all.
And then last year, big surprise, he comes out.
3. She lets them use her.
Parker was her stupid mistake. A little scared and away from home, she’d clung to the first thing that meant stability to her, a relationship. Parker was dark like Angel, funny like Scott and when he told her about his father’s death she felt as though she might finally have found someone who would understand how it felt to watch a loved one die.
Lying in his bed that night, she though how nice it would be to have a steady boyfriend to lead her through the strange new ways of college life. But if there’s one thing Buffy’s learnt it’s that boys with that much charm and goods look will always be bastards underneath.
Final moment - When she sees him on the fourth day without a phone call, chatting to another girl, she’s confused. Her mind had been so busy convincing herself that he was stuck in a ditch somewhere that it comes as quite a shock to see him happily walking around campus.
His words don’t sink in at first, the tone too light and cheerful. But when he spells it out she understands at last, blinking back tears and backing off. College life wasn’t meant to be like this.
It was fun, didn’t you have fun? What else was it supposed to be?
4. She lets them get away.
Riley was her second chance. The steadying hand to hold her when the world got too much to bear. He’s cheerful and kind, every inch the good Iowa boy. And when she finds out that he knows about the darker sides of Sunnydale, her reaction is relief. For the first time since Angel, she doesn’t have to lie.
Unfortunately, he does. She feels betrayed. He was supposed to save her from the evils of this world, not the other way round. But if there’s one thing Buffy’s learnt it’s that things never happen the way they’re supposed to.
Final moment – He should have waited longer before telling her, should have let her anger fade. But he doesn’t have time and she knows that. All the same it’s too soon, fury still fresh and she can’t help the bitter pleasure of letting him walk out the door without her reassurance. He shouldn’t have done what he did.
But when the anger fades she finds the pain and pride have gone too and she realizes she doesn’t want this man to leave. But it’s too late. She watches in despair as the helicopter disappears from sight, knowing that inside sits a man who believes she let him go without a backward glance.
I’m leaving Buffy. Unless you give me a reason to stay… I’m leaving tonight.
5. She doesn’t love them enough.
Spike was her dirty little secret. The secret that comes to mean more to her as each day goes by. Love and hate run such a similar course within her that sometimes the line blurs and a fight will turn too easily into a fuck.
Their relationship is paved in whispers and dark alleys, stormy and bittersweet. He loves her and she knows it, clings to his words with both her hands. But if there’s one thing Buffy’s learnt it’s that a man’s love is never enough.
Final moment – Was this their final moment? Was this how it ended? Hands clasped in fire, walls falling around them and the end of the world at their heels. It feels too much like a metaphor.
At that moment she truly does love Spike, honestly with all her heart. For what he’s done and what he’s doing, she is grateful. And for the second time in her life she seals a death with her kiss and the words “I love you”.
No you don’t, but thanks for saying it